Transvestia

odd-jobs I could to help with the family finances. It was usually, mean, hard, dirty work, but necessary. Work though, was distracting enough to keep me sep- arated from most of the kids my age, so I didn't feel so much the social pariah that mixing with them brought on. I never went to school dances, parties, games, or other functions. I shunned girls because I had so social graces, couldn't dance, nor make "small talk". About the only activities I had that would bring me in contact with other people was skating--both ice and roller. This was my one means of feminine expression, for even male skaters, to show good form, must be lithe and graceful in every movement.

By the age of sixteen, I was working in the steel. mills, learning the rudiments of what was to become my lifelong occupation. I have become rather good at my trade and take much satisfaction from doing things with my hands. Even though I was earning a salary at last, there was little enough for neces- sities, so none of the money I earned could be spent on what I yearned for most--a feminine wardrobe. Besides, I was much too uncertain of myself and much too fearful about being 'caught' to have anything of my own. So, I was terribly inhibited and withdrawn in my growing-up years.

Even as I grew into manhood, I yearned deeply for the feminine world. Many is the time that I wanted so strongly that I prayed for the Good Lord to change me into a girl so that I could be what my heart told me I ought to be. There was so little joy in being a man that the feminine world was like heaven to me. As every TV and FP knows, not even prayer can change us once we are born. My prayers were unanswered and I was as miserable as before. If wishing could make us girls, there would be no TV's, we'd all be girls!

As the ominous days of World War II came, the emotional tensions increased. I dreaded the thought

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